Its day three of being home…Alone. Well technically not alone. Dad is there, maybe mom or an in-law is there as well. Oh and let us not forget the new bundle of joy that needs 24hour attention. He or She is very much present and would like to be accounted for. So why do you feel so alone? Many mothers get home with their new ones and are quite confounded on how to do things as routine as brushing their teeth. The support of the hospital staff and their routine of checking on you is no longer available. The availability of people to change your sheets, bring you food and respond to every nurse call button push is no longer an option. And if you had a home birth or have previous children, the home life never really stopped. You are now faced with the stark reality that “the show goes on”. The question becomes “how”? I once went to visit a mom and the joy I provided in allowing her wash her hair seemed equivalent to me gifting her a million dollars!
Mom’s, do NOT make the assumption that all will be like it once was. Do not give yourself the burden of “keeping it all together”. You are now responsible for a new life and that new life didn’t read the “rule book”! So many times I have witnessed mothers struggling to put it all together in the early days. Figuring out the balance and the routine can be challenging. So what can you do?
The blessing of the postpartum doula. She is a helper. Someone who is only committed to helping you find balance and get settled into mommy-dom. She is knowledgeable about your recent journey, nurturing and efficient. She is removed enough from you that she simply can do and offer to you just what you need done. She is aware of post partum depression, educated on breastfeeding and post birth self care. Use her! Simply having a break for needed sleep or attending to self or spending a moment with siblings who may miss mommy, can make the day a success.
Many birth doulas will offer postpartum doula services as well. There are also some who are solely postpartum doulas. There are multiple sites to assist you in your search. I strongly suggest that you take advantage of the support. It will be an investment well spent!
From a Doula with love.